Today you did again as you always do, throwing me off my composure. Was I not clear when I asked you to leave me be? It's too painful, I have to move on and moving on means erasing you from my life. I know the deepest of your core and my access to it is closest than anyone could ever be. My connection to your inner landscape extends far beyond what we both know. Careless abandon let me in, I only ask to forget. For no love nor affection can save us from our own selfish selves.
Please know I am a forgotten past and let it be, my dearest. I will never be as carefree and hopeful like you. I envy your passion and how each day brings faith to you. Mine is only measured by the comfortable compromises I have swallow to be sane and safe. I should have never mistook your passionate kisses for love. I should have shut my ears each time you professed your love like a romantic fool. What is this evil manifesto but a comforting buffer from the cruelty of maturity and time. I have witnessed myself and everyone else around me fall into this trap only to end up in a reluctant resolve–mediocre happiness. Nothing is as gratifying as self-worth in the end all you want is to be recognized, heard and placed on the pedestal. I am gone and never existed at all.
Goodbye please, I ask you to just let it be. Thrown away, tucked away, obscure and forgotten. That is what life has become. Find your love and your peace even in pretense.
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